Rest in Peace, my darling.

This heart of mine is so heavy today. I've been trying to distract myself with other things... like making an apron, going to the car-boot sale with my husband, reading into the wee hours of the morning, and today i even played on the Wii... But i can't help but revisit the terrible news i received last night.
My sweet, sweet second cousin Evan died on Friday. He was in his early twenties - far too young to leave this world.

Each time i visited Kansas to see my dad's side of the family, Evan was there. Most people aren't close with their second cousins... My case is a different one for sure. My parents were older when they adopted me, so in turn - my cousin Lori's son was closer to my age. Since we were the only ones around the same age at family functions - of course we became close!
We used to spend hours together talking, laughing, sharing our "deepest secrets" in his room or in my Aunt's swimming pool. Our birthdays were one day apart, which we thought was funny although he was four years my junior. We'd play computer games together. He would generously share all his cool gizmos and toys with me. I'd help him clean his fish tank. We would make up songs on the harmonica together, listen to music as we got older. When i visited Kansas with my car, we drove around together talking, and listening to the radio. We'd laugh together and we shared a common bond when both of our parents had died (his dad, and my mom - separately, but very close in time-frame) - we held each other and cried together. Incidentally, we ended up being very close - unfortunately, we were caught up in our own lives and we were so far apart that we didn't talk often - but when we were together it was like not a day had passed.

I don't even know why, when we both became more technically advanced - with facebook, emails, and texting right at our literal fingertips ALL the time, we didn't communicate more often...

The news of Evan's death hit me like a ton of bricks. I'm still trying to catch my breath.

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Evan's Obit, from The Leavenworth Times:

Leavenworth, Kan. -
Evan Norwood
21, Leavenworth

Evan James Norwood, 21, of Leavenworth, passed away Friday, May 28, 2010, at his home.

He was born Aug. 19, 1988, in Leavenworth, the son of James A. and Lori A. (Foster) Norwood.

Evan is survived by his mother, Lori A. Norwood of Leavenworth; his sister Jessica A. Norwood and fiancé Mike Frederick; his niece, Layla Frederick; his grandparents, Larry and Tegwin “Ann” Foster and Kenneth and Mary Norwood; and many cousins, aunts, uncles and friends.

He attended Leavenworth High School where he was active in the Pioneer Band. He was very gifted with music. He played the piano, trumpet and trombone. Evan loved his family, especially his niece Layla. He also cherished his long-time friends.  Some of his fondest memories are of the time spent fishing with his dad who preceded him in death on July 9, 2006.

Mass of Christian burial will be at 10 a.m. Tuesday, June 1, 2010, at St. Casimir Catholic Church with Rev. Phillip Winkelbauer as celebrant. Burial will follow at Mount Muncie Cemetery. The family will receive friends for lunch at the church following the burial. Arrangements entrusted to R.L. Leintz Funeral Home. Memorials are suggested to Leavenworth High School Pioneer Band, St Casimir Catholic Church or the Leavenworth Cruisers.

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"Be Still My Soul"

  Be still, my soul; the Lord is on thy side;
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain;
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul; thy best, thy heavenly, Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.

Be still, my soul; thy God doth undertake
To guide the future as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence, let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul; the waves and winds still know
His voice who ruled them while He dwelt below.

  Be still, my soul, though dearest friends depart
And all is darkened in the vale of tears;
Then shalt thou better know His love, His heart,
Who comes to soothe thy sorrows and thy fears.
Be still, my soul; thy Jesus can repay
From His own fulness all He takes away.

  Be still, my soul; the hour is hastening on
When we shall be forever with the Lord,
When disappointment, grief, and fear are gone,
Sorrow forgot, love's purest joys restored.
Be still, my soul; when change and tears are past,
All safe and blessed we shall meet at last

 Text: Psalm 46:10
Author: Catharine Amalia Dorothea von Schlegel, 1752, cento
Translated by: Jane Borthwick, 1855
Titled: "Stille, mein Wille"
Composer: Jean Sibelius, b. 1865, arr.
Tune: "Finlandia"